080310 Here I Am

Here I am. Lying down on my back, tracing little hearts on the ceiling with my brown irises. I line everything that I am in a row before me, but I'm a trembling coward for I only lower my defenses when I'm able to hear nothing but the nervous beating of my quivering heart.

Here I am. Out in the open, breathing in the bittersweet night and feeling the icy air prickling my arms, daydreaming that you're going to sneak up from behind me and wrap me into your arms, painting the air temperate against the silvery liquid stars.

Here I am. Absorbing the silence because I know that embracing it would be lying to myself. I feel inquisitiveness flare at the tips of my eyelashes and bury within my paper-thin heart as it beats and lingers for you, noiselessly giving in to wishes and hope.

Here I am. Fiddling with my thoughts as anxious bubbles hover up to my trembling lips as I anticipate spilling everything that I am to you because I promised that I would live my life without regrets, even if it would have us fighting against the stillness alone.

Here I am. Chewing on the restless, unsettled hesitant bottom lip that I have because I can't fathom the deathly terrifying idea of seeing your back walk away from me because of my heart's aspiration to get to know you and be there for you as much as I can ever since we danced together.

Here I am. Sucking in the apprehensive aura and exhaling the way you make me feel and how I see your flaws and your fears, but how I still see you as my miracle. Do you see it? My heart? Because we're here and nothing else matters to me, but telling you just how much you mean to me.

Well….yeah…

Here I am.